Loners Are Not Cool

            We live in the midst of a ‘take care of yourself, you don’t need anyone’ culture. Those who are loners are seen as strong and they are glorified on television as ultra cool. Those who openly admit to needing other people are viewed as weak or dependent. We buy into this idea that its ok to have superficial relationships, and keep the deep hurts or longings of our souls to ourselves. Sure, we have acquaintances. We may call them friends, but often they are just people who know the face we show them and not the true us. We decide that we can be our own best friend. This is especially true for those of us who have been hurt or damaged by the attitudes or actions of someone else. Each hurtful memory or painful word becomes a brick in the wall of isolation that we build around our lives. Often in the midst of despair, we withdraw. We become isolated and convinced that it is best to go through the pain and the fear of our trial by ourselves. After all, no one would really understand or care anyway would they? We decide it’s best to just keep it to ourselves. We will live on this island, and be just fine.

            So how would that have worked out for the individual mentioned to us at the beginning of Mark chapter 2? We don’t know a lot about this man. His entire life would have been confined to his bed or ‘mat’. Because of his disability, many in his society would have blamed sin in his life or the sin of his parents as the reason for his paralysis. So on top of being completely helpless, he would also have been an outcast. But, he did have something going for him. As a matter of fact he had 4 things going for him. You see this guy was a part of one of the greatest small groups of all time. He had true friends, not acquaintances, but friends. And his friends were determined to help him live a better life. They were determined to not allow him to set up residence on the island of isolation. They would be there for him and they would do everything within their power to make things better. And then opportunity presented itself. When they heard that Jesus was coming home, something stirred in them. Jesus could help him, they just knew it. If they could just get their friend to Jesus, things would somehow be different in his life. They became resolved: they would get their friend to him whatever it took.

            So who knows exactly how it happened. There they were having arrived at the house where Jesus was teaching. They were slower than everyone else, perhaps arriving late. Not their fault by the way, don’t forget they were carrying someone the whole way. Perhaps they felt disappointment as they saw the overflow crowd. No way they were getting in now. The place was full and they couldn’t squeeze in carrying a man on a mat. But determination overrode any feelings of apathy. They would get their friend to Jesus the only way they knew how. They made the decision – they would become roof crashers for their buddy. And the rest of the story is history. Their friend would walk home, check that, he probably ran home because of Christ and because of community.

            This is the picture of the life we were intended by God to lead. We were made for community. We need each other. I don’t mean that in just a ‘getting warm-fuzzy feelings’ type of way. I don’t mean that in a way that you just go play golf or shopping with a group of friends every other Saturday. I mean being involved with others who know you, all of you. They know your strengths and the depth of your past regrets or hurts. They have experienced your weaknesses first hand and they love you anyway. They are determined to lift you up when you are down, and never allow you to cement those bricks in the wall of isolation. If need be, they will help you tear it down. This is community the way God intends it to be. This is the type of community that glorifies His name to the nations. This is Christian community that is bonded together by the grace and love of Jesus Christ.

            Within this community is power, and I mean real power. Don’t believe me? Read Mark chapter 2 again. Did you catch verse 5? ‘When Jesus saw their faith’. Whose faith did Jesus see? Just the paralyzed man’s faith? No – you see Jesus looked up at the huge hole in the roof and he saw four faces looking down. They were tired, sweating, but determined faces. Hopeful faces. Loving faces. Faithful faces. He saw community, and I have to believe He liked what He saw. And because of their faith, their friend walked – oh yea – ran home.

            There is power in the faithful gathering of God created, God supported, and God empowered community. I encourage you, no I exhort you to get plugged in somewhere to a faithful gathering of believers. I don’t just mean corporate worship. Corporate worship is God ordained and it is powerful. But it is not the place to make real, deep relationships. I am talking about taking the time, and it will take time, and the effort to get to know other believers and let them get to know you. Take off the mask that traditionally we have put on when we go to church. Get involved in a small group. Get to know each other. Carry someone else’s mat and let them carry yours. We will never experience this community and this power on an island of isolation.

Loners are not cool, they are just – well, alone. Community is cool. Just ask the paralytic man.

For HIS Glory

David McConnell
Family Pastor
families@agapepinson.com